Another gem found by midcurrent.com.
http://midcurrent.com/2011/11/22/slowing-down-to-learn/
http://www2.mcdowellnews.com/sports/2011/nov/16/1/not-what-i-used-be-ar-1615842/
Not what I used to be
By: Marty Queen | dqueen@mcdowellnews.com
Published: November 16, 2011
No matter how I rationalize it, I know it’s true: I’m not the man I used to be.
I realized it one afternoon last summer up on Newberry Creek, while clambering upstream across the hunched, moss-covered backs of giant boulders and furtively crawling through prisons of tangled rhododendron branches just to present a tiny fly to a wild trout that languidly patrolled a quiet pool no bigger than a bathtub, occasionally rising to nonchalantly sip an insect too small for me to see off the surface.
It was a trout that would, in all likelihood, fit nicely into a sardine can, and which would quickly be released after capture.
“Why am I doing this?” I wondered aloud as I sat on a log, washing the blood from a shinbone I barked against a rock on my ascent. It was then the epiphany fell upon me: I was doing it because it felt like the absolute right and natural thing to do.
It still felt right and natural a few moments later, even as I stood untangling my line from an overhanging limb. The juvenile brook trout had erupted on the offering and my hook-set was a split-second late, missing the fish’s mouth altogether and launching my line into the gnarled carcass of a tree that had fallen across the creek.
I could only smile and shake my head.
There was a time in the not-too-distant past when trout fishing meant only one thing to me – trout. I measured my success and failure purely in terms of a full creel or heavy stringer. My goal was the same every time out – a limit, preferably of pan-sized fish, caught in the shortest possible amount of time. I killed, literally, thousands and thousands of trout.
I fished hard and fast and arrogantly. With my trusty spinning rod and an ample supply of bait, I approached each promising stretch of creek with a brazen *, and why not? I knew from experience if a given hole contained a trout, he’d be coming home with me as a dinner guest.
I was perfectly happy with that arrangement.
But somewhere along the way, when I wasn’t looking, things changed.
I’m sure the metamorphosis had something to do with switching from spin- to fly-fishing.
I quickly learned that to become proficient at it, as I had vowed to do, I had to slow down. Way down. I would no longer be able to tromp noisily from pool to pool, pausing occasionally to flip a backhanded cast through a thick veil of streamside vegetation and unceremoniously wrench an unsuspecting trout from the comfort of his living room.
Now, I had to pay attention to detail, planning each move in advance. Soon, I began to mentally picture how I would play a fish and where I’d try and land him before I even made a cast. It was a tedious and thoroughly exhausting type of fishing.
But it got easier, and as it did, a whole new world opened up to me, a by-product, it seemed, of the fly-fishing process.
Suddenly, there was wonder in things that had seemed before to be entirely pedestrian; a limbless tree branch that had fallen into the water and now somehow lay suspended delicately between two large rocks, one at the top and one at the bottom, of a small waterfall; a wayward stonefly nymph that wandered out from under his rock and now sat motionless on the toe of my wading boot; a school of shiners in their midsummer spawning color, a shade of red so pure and vibrant they seemed to glow.
The old me would have spared these sights only the briefest glance before soldiering on in relentless pursuit of a limit.
The man I had become saw each phenomenon for what it was – a miraculous fragment, an essential piece of nature’s marvelous tapestry, on display for a limited time, for these eyes alone.
To be sure, the old me caught more fish, but now, each one means so much more.
I have to think that’s a change for the better.